Too often, sports parents set goals for their kids that are different
than the kids' goals. It's important for parents and coaches to help
sports kids identify their own goals and then help them follow through
on them.

Says Dony Wilcher, a popular basketball coach in Portland, OR., 'I
had one parent who wanted the world for his child. He went out of his
way to get him the right equipment and send him to the top camps.'

'At the end of it all, he was perplexed that the kid was not a
superstar. In some cases, kids will veer away from the sport
altogether if the parents' goals are different than theirs.'

At first, most kids generally want to play sports to have fun and be
with friends. At that point, that's their goal, and it's not
necessary to set goals with them.

When they begin to be competitive--when they play in tournaments or
join competitive teams--it's time to begin talking about their goals.
For some children, this might be as young as 7 or 8--if they display
unusual talent and motivation.

For example, I worked with one 8-year-old motocross racer who spent
four hours per day training. It would be appropriate to talk about
goals with a child like this.

When you're talking with your young athlete, begin with a broad,
open-ended question.

If, for example. your child's goal is to try out for and make his or
her high school basketball team, that's the long-term goal. Ask the
child what he or she needs to do to make the team.

Evaluate his or her skills in dribbling, free-throw shooting, and
defense, for example. Try to de-emphasize the long-term goal of
making the team. When young athletes are too preoccupied with making
the team, they may impose too many expectations on themselves and
undermine their confidence.

Instead, parents and coaches should help young athletes identify
smaller, shorter-term goals, such as improving their free-throw
shooting.

Once you've helped your young athletes identify their goals, it's
your job to help them aim toward them. The parents, coaches and
athletes need to work as a team.

Parents should support their athletes by driving them to practices,
cheering them on, and finding ways to ensure they are able to follow
through on their commitments.

However, it's critical to be flexible. Parents and coaches should help
kids modify their goals on a weekly or monthly basis.

Want to learn more about helping young athletes feel happy and
confident in sports? Check out our latest program, 'The Ultimate
Sports Parent' workbook and CD program:

http://youthsportspsychology.com/ultimate_sports_parent_workbook.php

You'll learn...

*How much pressure is too much
*How to prepare young athletes on game day
*How to help kids stop worrying about what everyone thinks of their
performance
*How to help kids overcome their fear of failure
*And much more!

Sincerely,

Patrick Cohn, Ph.D., Mental Training Expert

P.S. 'The Ultimate Sports Parent' workbook program comes with a neat
bonus that helps parents act and say the right things before a game
or competition, which you can download immediately:

http://youthsportspsychology.com/ultimate_sports_parent_workbook.php

©2007 The Ultimate Sports Parent by Peak Performance Sports
Instilling Mental Skills for Sports & Life!
888-742-7225 407-909-1700 (local)
http://www.peaksports.com
http://www.youthsportspsychology.com/
7380 Sand Lake Rd. Orlando, FL 32819